「About a year ago」
“[I live] a life of rejection instead of abandon. A sense that in all “good” things and all close friends, there is always a line drawn that you had better not cross. But the lines are drawn in fuzzy logic, and you don’t get to know why they exist or how to best avoid tripping over them.
Illness of all kins casts its long, dark shadow over the potential landscape of your life. And the very thing you fear the most will happen over and over again.
A life of poor luck and bad karma. Maybe in a past life you squandered all you got and these stinging rejections are the universe balancing out. Perhaps, all this pain in place of death is a making up for deaths on end. Perhaps in your other live, there will be love in its stead.”
Approaching the circumvention of a year and considering how I felt when I left places I no longer fit in for a place I did not know. Now, I know this place and long to return to the ones I left. The question is now: what will I be met with upon return?
Home, have you changed? Will you accept the me that has?