Tashi wa miru para kaeru de toshidoshi

And what comes of?

Only what we already knew. Of course.

But tonight, cards in hand and sage burning around me and a candle lit for more than light — I read for you.
Listen close.

Your life is full of discord. Conflicts of interests everywhere force you to feel self-protective, self-intersted, self-preserving. You’ve been fighting and fighting, but the world must be allied against you. You can see easily how the options you have at this point could profit you, if done correctly. The ends, you’re sure this time, will justify the means you use to protect yourself.

But. Inside, you feel a seed of something else. The possibility of security, of prosperity, of success. You can see just the hint, the glint of it. You know it is there only because you can feel it slowly growing. It will come to fruition if you tend to it, you are sure. But the tending will be a long and steady process. And with all this discord and conflict, how can you find the time to grow a tiny seed when you could bury the whole world and protect yourself?

Underneath this conflict, you feel a connection to the histories and stories of those who have come and gone before you. You have roots in these stories, in these esablished rituals, in these long-held beliefs. You are confident in these and you know to seek wisdom and spirituality within these roots.

Most aparent in this conflict is the need for not the established rituals of the past, but the natural mysteries of the world around you. The secret wisdom of the cycles of life and death, the turnings of the sun and moon. The key to unlocking the world is found in the mysterious spiritual truths of the world itself beyond the systems created by people to ellucidate it.

Behind you are the times of feeling serenly protected. Before this conflict, you were comforted in knowing that you would be kept safe in the face of uncertainty or attack. You had available to you a wellspring of spiritual and emotional guidance. You knew there was a place you could go where the turmoil around you would always be calmed to a steady peace.

The next step for you is to focus on having noble intentions and good intent. Don’t be blinded by the already established rules and systems around you. Allow yourself the freedom of experiencing any and all situations without the binds of social constraints. Engage in the world with a newly open mind.

To you, this will feel like a moment of enlightenment, revealing everything and understanding what was revealed. You will feel newly invigorated, knowing you can achieve a place of prominance.

To others, this will appear to be a rescue from conflicts you could not win against. You will appear lifted away from ongoing conflict. You will appear to float and drift away on wings that are not your own.

The key to resolving this conflict is discernment and judgement. Focus on weighing all the options logically. Don’t allow your judgement to be clouded over by emotions or self-interest. Choose what you believe to be right without regard to how much it will cost you. Choose the best option for all parties involved based on all the available knowledge. Take into account feelings, but do not bow to your own fears of self-preservation.

If all goes well, the place you end up could be a beautifully balanced unit where all the parts engaged work smoothly and positively together. The work will be easy because of the unique balance between the members of that unit. You will be able to embrace the fact that not everything needs to be done alone, nor should it be. You will be happy. You will be an integral part of accomplishing something amazing with grace and skill.

Translation of title: I look with the intention of seeing the turning of years and years as if over my shoulder.

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