Or rather, it’s how you are now. A slowly darkening landscape with the light carefully, beautifully going out. In my memory, you will stand some five/six months. A year or two might do you some good there. But, look over these emotions in a handful, a century and the images will be so blurred I’ll hardly recognize what made me once stir, come to life, and fall on hands and knees with tears in my eyes.
I sat in your back cuppboard crying like this one day while the sun was still high and we were still near it.
I sat on my hands and a stump, thinking somehow I could still grasp it.
Didn’t realize I had to let it loose, let it fall, give up and leave to really see it.
Now, I see stark white in the bright light all that I was missing from this place.
All this place was missing for me.
All I missed in its place.
Strange conclusions, all of these.
And yet, without those ropes and ties and lines and rings — I find I’m much more at peace.
And yet, so strange to be.